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  • Writer's picturefmblum

REVELATION: Bevis and Butthead are Q!

Updated: Apr 5, 2021

It struck me last night like a bolt screaming down from Mount Olympus. The mysterious Q has to be teenager stoners. This dogma had to have been created in a drug-induced haze while its creators were on the edge of a mushroom-enhanced coma. What else but a hallucinogenic fog can explain a conspiratorial scheme where Hillary Clinton ("HRC") is part of a worldwide cabal of pedophiles who drink children's blood while consuming their flesh? With the only thing standing between this satanic dinner party and us being our previous Dear Leader.

Now to reveal the actual names and identities of Q. Yes, I already gave away that it is more than one person. And they are . . .[drum roll] . . . . . . Beavis and Butthead (from now on affectionately referred to as "B&B").


B&B are two delinquent Texan teen high school students who are short on intelligence, morality, empathy, and ethics and prefer television to any exercise. They are known for a wicked smirk and chuckle, which materializes alongside any comment with even the slightest sexual overtone. The boys have little if any redeeming social value and thrive on creating mayhem to entertain themselves.

Just consider some of the truth-telling that is attributed to Q. It has to have come from B&B. Did you know that Congresswoman and former Democratic National Committee chairwoman Debbie Wasserman Schultz paid for the murder of a staffer to cover up HRC's email problems? Or that Angela Merkel, the German chancellor, is really Adolf Hitler's granddaughter? Or that the mega-rich Rothschild family is actually the leader of a cult? Or that "each mass shooting is a false-flag attack [is] organized by the cabal" so they can get your guns?

And then there is my favorite. Remember JFK. Jr. died in a plane crash? He did not, according to the followers of Q. He is just keeping a low profile and revealing himself in July of last year as a supporter of our previous Dear Leader. To make the news even better, after his reappearance, JFK. Jr. would replace Mike Pence as our previous Dear Leader's running mate.

To propose that B&B are actually the real identities of that truth-teller Q must mean that I am munching on schrooms. But some of the best ideas I have ever had occurred when I was in college and bathed in drug-induced brilliance. I don't remember any of the brilliant thoughts, but I know they would make Plato envious

There is definite proof of the B&B as Q theory. Q's first post on October 28, 2017 proclaimed that HRC had been arrested and that mass riots would follow. The only way that Q could have missed that this did not happen was through the aforementioned drugs. Almost none of Q's predictions have come true. There was no storm propelling our previous Dear Leader into his second term and JFK. Jr. is still as dead as Elvis. These escalating mayhem and chaos predictions have the ring of stoners competing with each other to see who can be the most outrageous. Competition is a beautiful thing, and when competition is turbocharged with creative pharmaceuticals, there is nothing that cannot be achieved. No accomplishment is beyond the grasp of a drug-addled teenager.

The most substantial evidence of B&B's presence is the hero they picked. Only two kids who, by virtue of being in their teens and having the common sense of a slug, with the confidence of a God, can choose our prior Dear Leader as the superhero who will rid the world of blood slurping, flesh munching pedophiles. Our previous Dear Leader, according to B&B, I mean Q, was to lead an uprising called the Storm. The Storm would lead to the death of the leaders of the cabal. These cabal leaders included HRC and her hubby and President Obama, billionaire George Soros, the Pope, Tom Hanks, Oprah Winfrey, and lesser humans.

But our previous Dear Leader as the hero? Need we be reminded who our previous Dear Leader is? He is the same guy who repeatedly made lewd sexual comments about his daughter. The lowlights are:

· When asked what he and his daughter both consider their favorite things, previous Dear Leader answered, "I was going to say sex, but I can relate to [golf and real estate]."

· "Ivanka posing for Playboy would be really disappointing… not really. But it would depend on what was inside the magazine…I don't think Ivanka would [do a nude shoot] inside the magazine, Although she does have a very nice figure. I've said that if Ivanka weren't my daughter, perhaps I'd be dating her."

· "Is it wrong to be more sexually attracted to your own daughter than your wife?"

If this isn't creepy enough, consider these other tidbits, such as Dear Previous Leader's Access Hollywood comments regarding p***y grabbing. Best of all, there are the multiple times when he used his position as owner of Miss Teen Universe Pageant to barge in while teenage contestants were in various stages of undress.

Given our previous Dear Leaders history and predilections, you would expect him to be the first person in line at any buffet organized by the cabal.

In choosing our previous Dear Leader, B&B could have thought that he was a double agent. Pretending to be part of the cabal, or at least an enthusiastic sympathizer, he was really trying to bring it to its knees. It's a possibility, sure, if you ignore the universal truth that if you are going to be a double agent, it's best not to advertise.

But, if not our previous Dear Leader, then who? Two possibilities quickly come to mind. The most obvious is some ardent anti-Semite who is dedicated to continuing to rid the world of the Elders of Zion. In case you didn't know, they are the international Jewish cabal that controls the banks. When you hear worldwide cabal, you have to think of Jews. And to top it off, Jews have been accused of using goyim children's blood in their matzah for centuries. It's called a blood libel. I hear it makes matzah salty.

The Jewish theme's problem is that it has been done many times before. Any worldwide conspiracy to do something horrendous eventually centers on the Jews. B&B doesn't seem like guys who want to be copycats. It would be beneath them. Besides, there definitely is no worldwide Jewish cabal since I am Jewish, and I have yet to get my cut of the proceeds. If there is one, then this is my demand for my share. Contact me for wiring instructions.

The obvious alternative to our previous Dear Leader is Monty Python, also known as the Pythons to their close friends. Who but the creators of Monty Python and the Holy Grail, The Life of Brian, and The Meaning of Life could be Q? It fits like the shirt on the winner of a wet t-shirt contest.

Why the Pythons? What led me to focus on them was that Q's proclamations were much like bringing out your dead scene in the Holy Grail. If you don't remember or have not had the privilege of viewing it, just go to YouTube. Think of the brilliant minds that could write a comedy sketch based on the Black Death.

You have to love the term "Black Death." It uses the two of the words that bring chills to the gumby-like spine of our previous Dear Leader: Black and death. Death because of the obvious. Black because these were the people, more than any others, who made sure that our Dear Leader was turned into our previous Dear Leader. They dared to vote against him even though he was the best president for blacks since maybe Lincoln. Just forget about Charlottesville and all those upstanding Nazi and Klan members.

For those who don't know, the Black Death was a plague that made Covid-19 look like a heat rash. By the time it was done ravaging the world's population, so many people had died that it took 200 years for population levels to recover. But like Covid, there was a success in finding a scapegoat. It wasn't Asians, but a more convenient and traditional bogeyman – The Jews were supposedly poisoning water wells.

Not many have the audacity or the grey matter to expertly make fun of such a calamity. And given their knowledge of the forces of death, the Pythons are keenly aware of what it takes to lead a battle against a satanic force. So why not them? They would be a far better choice than our previous Dear Leader, except for one thing. The Pythons disbanded in the early 1970s. Even though they made a few movies after that, they are in no position to take on the tremendous responsibility of Qdom.

Since there is a lack of suitable alternatives, maybe our previous Dear Leader is the perfect hero. The perfect guard for the hen house may just be the wolf. Our previous Dear Leaders sexualizing his daughter and peeping at the girls at the Miss Teen Universe Contest was just his way of getting the information he needed to lead the crusade against HRC. His praise of his pal Jeffrey Epstein who he referred to as a "terrific guy," was just a dodge. He didn't mean it when our previous Dear Leader said of Jeff that "[h] e's a lot of fun to be with. It is even said that he likes beautiful women as much as I do, and many of them are on the younger side. No doubt about it—Jeffrey enjoys his social life." After Ghislaine Maxwell's arrest for being Jeff's lead pimp, our previous Dear Leader wished her good luck to mislead the Q mob.

Or maybe, he had an epiphany, turned his life around, and leading the charge was his penance. Regardless, he is what we got.

With the leader in place, the next job for B&B was to refine their message. When you start with the premise that HRC is part of a cabal of cannibalistic pedophiles, you have nowhere to go but down. B&B may not have been the most well-read duo. Nor were they history scholars. But anyone who has ever watched TV knows that the go-to bad guys are Nazis. Even Two and Half Men, which B&B considers highbrow entertainment, had an episode called Its Always Nazi Week.

Nazis were the inventors of the "Big Lie." Dr. Joe added all the necessary bells and whistles. Dr. Joe was Hitler's minister of propaganda and a virulent Jew-hater. To show his love for his pal Hitler, soon after Hitler killed himself, Dr. Joe and his wife committed suicide, but only after killing six of his children. The family that slays together stays together.

Dr. Joe and His Girls

The term "big lie" is defined by Merriam-Webster as "a deliberate gross distortion of the truth used especially as a propaganda tactic." It is a lie so big and so audacious that it has to be the truth.

As big and audacious go, the central tenants of Q are up there with the best that Dr. Joe could conjure. It goes well beyond the existence of the cabal. Q has prophesied that HRC, Soros, and President Obama are actually planning a coup to prevent our previous Dear Leader from leading the Storm to end the cabal. Our previous Dear Leader enlisted none other than ex-FBI Director and Special Prosecutor Robert Mueller to stop the coup. Muller's Russia investigation's real purpose was to uncover and stop Russians from assisting the cabal and removing our previous Dear Leader. To ensure that our previous Dear Leader could not lead the Storm, the cabal stole the election and handed it to President Biden. But don't worry your pretty little head. Trump will find a way to eventually triumph.

Wow! What a fantastic story. There is nothing the bad guys and gals will not do to ensure the continuation of their entertainment and meal plan. These are real bad dudes and dudettes, and we must thank our lucky stars that we have our previous Dear Leader to protect us.

This brings us back to where we started. I am not opposed to using mind-expanding drugs to jump-start the creative process. And I recognize that the 2:00 a.m. drug-induced haze is fertile ground for conjuring up ideas that would never see the light of day at any other time. But I am also aware of the truth that was imparted to me by the captain of a cruise ship: "do it but don't overdo it."

B&B overdid it, and when I am finished writing, I am going to track them down and, along with their friends, and perform an intervention. They are the victims of drug-induced brain rot. Or maybe not, since I just realized that they are not real either.

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